Further Insight

Had quite a dislillusioning day today at work.

Nothing really untoward: I got a piece of work done in the morning that I was very happy with and didin't experience any difficulties overall.

However, in the afternoon I had an informal meeting with my ultimate boss. She informed me that I wouldn't be able to do extra work in the evenings which was earning me a nice amount of money in overtime and which, to be frank, I did really need on a personal basis.

She also seemed to imply that the takeover we are currently going through is likely to mean changes. I understood and expected this of course. However, it has thrown into doubt where I am ultimately going and what I want to do and I don't feel I need this at the moment.

She rather threw the ball back into my court and asked what "I wanted to do"? I can't really answer that at the moment; not until the wider picture becomes clearer of course.

I am going on holiday in a couple of weeks (so will be off line then) and I am going to leave it until after then and have a think in the meantime. My break will give me a chance to ponder and consider!

What I find so hard - and dispiriting if I am honest - as a person with Asperger, is my lowre ability to discern what is going on. The messages I am receiving could be construed in a number of ways, but I don't feel I have got a true handle on them.

A key lesson I have learned from past experience is not to react prematurely, even though, emotionally and intuitively I always feel like doing so!